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The ABCs of Dealing With Domestic Violence

Domestic violence was a part of my family's life for years. When I made the decision to leave with my children, I had to rely on the law to provide the protection we needed. Sometimes, the system does not work as fast as we want. I soon learned that going at it alone without any guidance caused significant delays. I created this blog to help others who are seeking legal means to deal with an abusive ex. By making the right moves, it is possible to get the necessary protections in place so that you can also live a happier and healthier life.


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The ABCs of Dealing With Domestic Violence

Three Common Mistakes to Avoid in Your Divorce

by Gina Hill

Although you might think that a settlement is the quickest and easiest way to end your divorce, it's important that you don't sacrifice your own needs in the process. Unfortunately, some people end up making mistakes along the way in the interest of settling things quickly. Here's a look at a few of the most common divorce missteps so that you can avoid them in your situation.

1. Know Your Financial Status

In some marriages, one spouse takes control of the household finances, managing the bills and dealing with all of the credit and investment accounts. This often happens when one spouse isn't as strong with finances as the other. If you've always left the financial things to your spouse, it's time to familiarize yourself with your current financial situation. After all, if you have no point of reference to determine how much money has been saved or what debts are outstanding, you're at a disadvantage for negotiation.

Before you leave your spouse, make sure that you have copies of all of the financial records. You'll need bank statements, credit card statements, investment account information, and past tax returns. If you don't want to ask your spouse for them, most can be obtained from your bank, the Internal Revenue Service, and your investment fund manager.

2. Build a Practical Budget

When you have an attorney file divorce papers, one of the forms you'll have to fill out is called a financial affidavit. It's a paper that details your current financial status for the court. Make sure that you include complete and accurate information on here, because it reflects your new living expenses.  If you're not yet sure where you're going to be or how much it is going to cost, talk with your divorce attorney about how to proceed with the form.

3. Don't Dismiss Mediation

If you're seeking a reasonably amicable, or at least civil, divorce, you may find that mediation saves you and your spouse a lot of time in court and waiting for document processing. If you're not able to talk openly together, though, this may not be effective. Mediation is a process where you and your spouse sit down with a third party who serves as a neutral point for your negotiations. You can work together as a group to come to an amicable resolution for your asset distribution, any alimony payments, and other considerations.

One of the best things about mediation is that it allows you to settle the whole case without having to go to court until the end. It can eliminate months of waiting for the court to process paperwork, and it might even save you a significant amount in court costs.

Whether you're the one filing for divorce or the one being served, it's important that you're in the best possible position to negotiate. With the tips here, you can protect yourself from the risk of losing everything due to a spouse who capitalizes on your unfamiliarity with the divorce process. Find an advocate who specializes in divorce law, like Craig H. Lane, PC, in your local area for further help.